I guess I have to prove my credentials here, right? I didn't have as many achievements to boast about, nor did I achieve flawless SPM results. But behind a picture, there's always an entire movie — and here is mine ♡
I was raised in Petaling Jaya, Selangor since the little baby I was. I went to SMK Sultan Abdul Samad in the same area until PT3 which I got 8A 1B. It is an impeccable result for me considering my standards then. I was not the top student and only have mediocre koku marks.
Nevertheless, I was offered a place at MRSM Tun Ghafar Baba (TGB). One of the best schools in Malaysia. I really wanted to experience the "asrama life", so I forthwith accepted it. But there is an opportunity cost. For every opportunity you take, you will always have to leave something behind. I had to make new friends, adapt to a new environment, and read science subjects (of which I hated). The culture shock took a big hit on me. I was crestfallen.
I was not really used to meet new people. So, when the time comes, it will go exactly as how you would imagine. I treated my new friends harshly. I was cocky about my achievements in my previous school to the point that I became oblivious of the competitive surroundings. Everyone there is equally, if not way better than I was in academics. Foolish of me not to realise it earlier. A myriad of problems barraged me the first few months I was there. I felt like no one was there to support me. The insecurities and deprivation of attention were really devastating. I could cry but the tears won't drop, even if I do, no one would care. It was no one's fault but mine. I will write more on this in my future blogs. As for now, it is adequate for you to know that I only got a 2.80 pointer for my first examination, placing me at the bottom 10th percentile of the ranking. Friends are important. You can never live on your own. It is the most important lesson that I have learned over the 2 years I studied in TGB. I started to rebuild my social aspect of life. Be understanding instead of disputing, be friendly indiscriminately, assist others in need. This is one thing that schools will never teach you. Aristotle is right. Empiricism — learning through our senses and experiences — is the most superior kind of knowledge. Every trough of your life is a chance for you to learn. We are bound to make mistakes, so flip the table to your side.
I have comprehensively explained my revamp in the aforementioned tweet. However, the tweet was posted 4 months before the big exam, so there are a few potholes that I would like to pave here. The entire exam month was full of stressful worries, yet I still managed to be optimistic throughout the exhausting ordeal. Notwithstanding that, I feel like that period would be on top of the list of my best times in TGB. The challenges and struggles were no different than what I experienced during my early days in TGB, but this time I have my friends with me. There will always be someone to ajak me to study in the classroom — early mornings and late nights. Laughter and the rush of adrenaline when playing futsal, wandering around the college, Friday night lepaks, and whatnots helped keep my sanity. One month went by so quick. What you thought might be a long process prospectively is too short to be fully satisfied when looking at it retrospectively. What I want to convey here is; always provide robust support for your friends to depend on. Rationally, of course. Every moment of misery will be 1000 times less concerning with the presence of human comfort. We sat for SPM. And that's it. I am done with high school. " 'Cause the hardest part of this, is leaving you"
Skip forward to the results day. We were the first batch to not receive our results at school lol (damn you covid). It was terribly disappointing how we have missed the chance to finally meet each other non-virtually. Sob stories aside, I GOT 8A+!!! I was soooo exhilarated to witness the fresh train of A-pluses on my slip. To be fair, though I did well for trials and it was somewhat expected for me, it still feels like a dream.
The only subject that I didn't get an A is Biology, which is predictable-ish considering my 'hatred' of the subject. (I still think I should take accounting instead). But oh well, I didn't even bother to recheck the subject which is kind of stupid but let the past be bygone or whatever.
After a long period of scholarships application and three essays later, alhamdulillah I was offered JPA-MARA to read International Baccalaureate social science in Kolej Mara Banting. However, just a few days later, I was shocked with even better news!
One year ago, this is no less than a castle in the air. It became my long-term dream after seeing my senior roommate getting the offer too. The reason all goes back to the same point. I don't think I would be able to do it alone without my friends that helped proofread my essays, spent their time doing a mock interview with me, discuss the case study prior to the assessment day. If you're reading this, you know who you are!! tq so much besties <3!! All praises to Allah, day-by-day, the dream to be an economics student at LSE is becoming more lucid. If I were to sum up everything I learned in one quote, it will be
"Storms prepare you for droughts"
Don't focus on how bad the situation is, instead try to solve the problem. If you failed to, it is okay. When you face the same situation in the future, you will know how to handle it better. Life is not a competition of who is the best at everything. Like in movies, you as the main character are bound to get into conflicts which ultimately helps you to progress your character until the ending. What makes the movie engrossing is the journey of encountering discords and struggles. No good movies have an utter upbeat tone throughout the scriptwriting. At the same time, the main character will always need their sidekicks. So, reach out to your friends and be considerate with everyone okiee!!
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